Don't hate the lion, kill the lion.

Author: Mohammed Nazari

Sometime ago I met this lady whose 5 year old daughter was abducted, tortured, probably sexually assulted and killed. To this date, several years later, the mother kept a huge hate towards the predator who was caught and put in jail for good.

I asked her how she would feel if a lion would have attacked her daughter and killed her. Would she hate the lion? We know that it is the nature of the lion to attack, when hungry or threatened. In a logical way we get rid of the threat, e.g. by killing or caging the lion, but we wouldn't hate the lion.

The predator of her daughter was diagnosed as a psychopath. Not much different than a lion, who doesn't realize what he is doing and the consequences.

The predator had never admitted to any wrong doing or sign of remorse, and he had even made a hint that he had done the little 5 year old a favor by killing her.

Then I asked her how she would feel if her own son, was a psychopath, by birth, and had done the same horrendous crime to someone else's little daughter? She did not want to take this test, understandably.

The reality in this case scenario, most likely because "we know" or "want to know more" about the psychological diseases, we would be more "understanding" of the fact that these type of predators don't know what they are doing. Although agreeing with putting him in jail, we may not hate our own son.

This way we avoid some of the emotional aspect of the suffering, such as "hate", and only go through the mourning of losing a child. I believe taking this logical approach will be more effective with less pain.

Although she did agree with the logic that I offered, she needed sometime to understand it by heart and be able to practice it in action, normal process of change.