What is the Penicillin for the social diseases? "I don't Know"

Posted by Mohammed Nazari on Monday, February 10, 2014 Under: Logic First - Emotion Third
What is the Penicillin for the social diseases? “I don’t know”

Author: Mohammed Nazari

Invention of the Penicillin was a huge step forward in the history of medicine. I believe with only one small change we will have the same huge step forward in our mental health as an individual as well as a society. And it is by saying “I don’t know, when we don’t know, and ask more questions instead of making comments”.

Lack of information in a field allows some to make comments or judgements, which is dangerous.

This is when one feels more comfortable making comments or judgments. Although as soon as one gets some sort of general information in the field/subject, they then realize that there is a lot more to be known before any comments or judgment is made.

How frequent does it happen that we make comments, have opinions, get excited,  passionate, angry and frustrated with others, authorities and government for the choices they have made, while we don’t know the details or are not qualified, due to lack of knowledge or education, to comment.

I believe this is the main source for most of the disagreements, frustrations and fights in our life and society.

1.       Once when in Toronto, a friend of mine and I were driving and all of sudden another car, cut us off. My friend got really angry and said “Does he think he's smart that he got ahead of me, what a ….”. I said “How do you know what he thinks”.  He said then why did he do what he did.  I said “I don’t know” however if you are really interested you can catch up to him and ask him. Then I added, “How do you know he did not see you and made a mistake, and now he is embarrassed about it”. I have made the same mistake of cutting someone off before, not seeing them for a moment and then be embarrassed about it, so I drove even faster so that they cannot see me. I am sure there could be a lot of different reasons as to why that guy cut us off, I just don’t know which one was his reason. So I am not going to comment or get mad at it, and rather if I could I would make sure he is aware of his mistake.

2.       Recently in Canada, rules have changed so that no student will fail a grade, meaning regardless of how poorly they do at school, they will move to the next grade the year after. This became a hot topic for some, complaining that the students won’t learn and that they have to work hard, and that they will suffer more as they go to the higher grades which will even be worse than failing a grade and so on. My answer is, although all of the above comments sound correct, I am not sure if I know all the details and reasoning that the authorities know, the authorities who made this decision, and to this extent I am not qualified to make any comment. However I can ask questions. I do believe that the authorities have the best intention of the society in mind. Has it happened where others commented or try to teach you how to do your job? Do you do the same to others, where you comment and teach them how to do their job, without knowing all the facts? In all these cases the best is “To ask why you do what you do instead of making comments and get angry or frustrated”.

The only question is do you trust that the authorities have the best intention of the students in mind?

3.     Several years ago, before computer was as advanced as it is now, we used our computer to send faxes at times. We got this hardware from a company in Vancouver and installed on our computer to do the job. After sometime, The fax function failed. I did call a professional to come and fix the problem. I asked him to fix the hardware. He spent more than an hour and finally said that we need to contact that company for a piece. Then I changed my request and asked if we could send fax through the computer itself. Within 15 minutes he got everything going. After paying his bill for an extra hour I learned my lesson "know the main purpose and ask the right question"

4.       How frequent you make comments about what other people or businesses, in your immediate circle or community, do without asking them why they do what they do”. Most likely you have been judged yourself on what you have done or said the same way although others should have asked why you did or said what you did or said before making comments.

Don’t rush into “commenting” and get the habit of “asking”. This way you will learn more and do not get frustrated or angry with others.

Most of our anger, worries and frustrations are due to our lack of knowledge and we could feel differently if we know more. So get used to "asking more" versus "making conclusions"

In : Logic First - Emotion Third 

comments powered by Disqus

Translate This Page


A Personal Journey (Speech)

Author: Mohammed Nazari

Please find the link to the YouTube videos below

Part 1:

                               Part 2:

  •  It is amazing, when you have a big "goal" in mind, most other big "problems" look like small "challenges"       
  • Education in Canada is more practical than in the east which is more theoretical. After all you can find the theory in books or online, without needing to go to school.

Reasons for my failure as an employee:

1. Higher Canadian standards and sensitivity level  

2. My defensive behavior    

  •  Blaming  your behavior or action does not mean blaming you as a person
  • One for all, All for one

3. Inability to be honest with my own feelings  

  • Pride that has no basis, doesn't allow you to be honest.

4.  Canadian are too polite to be honest   

  •  If you don't have anything nice to say then don't say anything
  • Read between the lines


  •  Knowledge of higher/different Canadian standards and simply following versus questioning them
  •  Longer orientation
  •  Welcoming comments and asking for further explanation versus defending our self
  • Being honest with our feelings and abilities:

o   Acknowledging your weakness is a sign of honesty and makes you stronger.

  • Asking versus commenting:

o   Don't assume, ask question

o   Don't comment, ask question

o   Don't judge, ask question

o   When in doubt, ask question

o   When you think you know, ask questions to clarify

o Comments are not welcome, questions are

·         What kind of question?

1. Open ended and unbiased questions

2. Yes-No questions to clarify

When you have a car problem whom you ask for help? your Doctor, mother or mechanic.

Although this question seems silly, we make this mistake all the time, asking a professional question from people outside of that profession and building opinions.

  • Ask questions from the right person(s). The ones with proven success.


You will learn more from the successful people who can show you how to succeed.

Unsuccessful people can show you how not to fail the way they did.

 While the pathways to success are few, there are multiple pathways to fail.

Which one is easier and more effective to learn?

 Uncle Google and my cousin YouTube can help you with any questions.

Starting my own business

  •  In order to have a good society/business, good structure is more important than good people.
  •  The main sources of work/interpersonal problems are: communication and expectations.
  •  Interpersonal skills are not just talking nicely but much more importantly is to follow a structure and    framework, even if it is not the best structure.
  • Having a poor structure is better than having no structure

I would I would recommend that you ask my uncle and cousin, Google and YouTube, about the following:


  • Active listening
  •  Critical thinking
  • Yes-No question
  • Open ended question
  • how to be honest with oneself


After all My success and happiness depends on your success and happiness.

Let us make life better for all of us.