What is your motivator?

Posted by Mohammed Nazari on Monday, December 29, 2014 Under: Logic First - Emotion Third
What is your motivator?

Author: Mohammed Nazari

Brought up into a relatively religious Muslim family, I was taught to believe in God watching my every move. This was how my parents made sure I didn't do anything wrong when nobody was watching.

Any wrong doing, no matter how small, would be punished by going to hell, burning alive for eternity and suffering every single moment. On the other hand every good act would be rewarded by going to heaven, where the reward would be enjoying wine, rivers of honey and milk, the best of all in including female angels whom would never lose their virginity. I have never experienced a virgin woman and don't know what I am missing.

I am not sure what a good Muslim woman would get in heaven?

The rewards in heaven are normally the things that we never had or are considered as bad/haraam in this world. I recognized the deviation in standards between heaven and earth. I believe this inconsistency creates a poor system by which to live.

This tactic, the greed for heaven and fear of hell, worked well for some time. Till one day, when I was around age 10, I was hungry and snuck an apple, that my mom had not allowed me to have, something like the forbidden apple:) Although it did taste delicious, when eating the apple, the whole time I was worried about getting caught. A few hours after my mom found out that one apple was missing. She asked me if I had one. Worried about the consequences I lied and said: no.

Around that stage in my life I had become more religious and this was the first lie I can remember. My conscious was built around heaven and hell and affected me quite a bit. A few days after I did make a confession to a friend of mine, who referred me to his mom for advice. She was a very religious lady. She justified my wrong doing by introducing me to the concept of "white lie". This meant given the circumstances it was ok for me to lie. Basically what she taught me was "lying could be good or bad, pending the circumstances". And circumstances are open to negotiation, and everyone can have his/her own way of justifying it.

Chances would have been high enough that if I had told the truth to my mom nothing would have happened anyway. She was a loving mother, like most mothers.

The "White lie" was the best way of avoiding responsibility without feeling guilty
at the cost of losing the chance of learning "dignity" and ability to deal with the facts.

The following quote is from an American Nobel prize winner, physicist Steven Weinberg:

Religion is an insult to human dignity, without it good people do good things and evil people do evil things, but for good people to do evil things it takes religion.

In : Logic First - Emotion Third 

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A Personal Journey (Speech)

Author: Mohammed Nazari

Please find the link to the YouTube videos below

Part 1:

                               Part 2:

  •  It is amazing, when you have a big "goal" in mind, most other big "problems" look like small "challenges"       
  • Education in Canada is more practical than in the east which is more theoretical. After all you can find the theory in books or online, without needing to go to school.

Reasons for my failure as an employee:

1. Higher Canadian standards and sensitivity level  

2. My defensive behavior    

  •  Blaming  your behavior or action does not mean blaming you as a person
  • One for all, All for one

3. Inability to be honest with my own feelings  

  • Pride that has no basis, doesn't allow you to be honest.

4.  Canadian are too polite to be honest   

  •  If you don't have anything nice to say then don't say anything
  • Read between the lines


  •  Knowledge of higher/different Canadian standards and simply following versus questioning them
  •  Longer orientation
  •  Welcoming comments and asking for further explanation versus defending our self
  • Being honest with our feelings and abilities:

o   Acknowledging your weakness is a sign of honesty and makes you stronger.

  • Asking versus commenting:

o   Don't assume, ask question

o   Don't comment, ask question

o   Don't judge, ask question

o   When in doubt, ask question

o   When you think you know, ask questions to clarify

o Comments are not welcome, questions are

ยท         What kind of question?

1. Open ended and unbiased questions

2. Yes-No questions to clarify

When you have a car problem whom you ask for help? your Doctor, mother or mechanic.

Although this question seems silly, we make this mistake all the time, asking a professional question from people outside of that profession and building opinions.

  • Ask questions from the right person(s). The ones with proven success.


You will learn more from the successful people who can show you how to succeed.

Unsuccessful people can show you how not to fail the way they did.

 While the pathways to success are few, there are multiple pathways to fail.

Which one is easier and more effective to learn?

 Uncle Google and my cousin YouTube can help you with any questions.

Starting my own business

  •  In order to have a good society/business, good structure is more important than good people.
  •  The main sources of work/interpersonal problems are: communication and expectations.
  •  Interpersonal skills are not just talking nicely but much more importantly is to follow a structure and    framework, even if it is not the best structure.
  • Having a poor structure is better than having no structure

I would I would recommend that you ask my uncle and cousin, Google and YouTube, about the following:


  • Active listening
  •  Critical thinking
  • Yes-No question
  • Open ended question
  • how to be honest with oneself


After all My success and happiness depends on your success and happiness.

Let us make life better for all of us.